Errors, errors again at Twitter. But I’m not sad, not when I have this to look at:

Thought Process:
1. So is that some kind of ultra-lightweight styrofoam whale?
2. Interesting. Do those packing peanuts shoot out of it’s blow hole? (that’s what she said)
3. And are those birds pigeons?
4. Maybe African? No, no, European.
5. That whale seems a bit too happy to be out of his natural habitat.
6. What a masochist… he is gonna die!
7. I guess I would want to leave if my water turned into lava and super sharp shark fins. (that’s what she said to say three times fast)
8. But lazy, lazy… wouldn’t the whale swim faster than those European pigeons could carry?
9. AHH! NOT EUROPEAN LAVA PIGEONS!?
10. And where did those European lava pigeons learn to make nets?
11. Lastly, can you get that rope at Home Depot?
12. The end.

Shmantz: http://www.thesmokinggun.com/archive/years/2008/0617081secrets1.html

Dinged By A G-String?
Woman, 52, sues Victoria’s Secret, claims injury from defective thong

JUNE 17–As she was attempting to put on a Victoria’s Secret thong, a Los Angeles woman claims that a decorative metallic piece flew off the garment and struck her in the eye, causing injuries and a new product liability lawsuit against the underwear giant. Macrida Patterson, 52, alleges that she was hurt last May by a defective “low-rise v-string” from the Victoria’s Secret “Sexy Little Thing” line, according to a lawsuit filed last week in Los Angeles Superior Court. A copy of her June 9 complaint, which does not specify monetary damages, can be found below. Patterson’s lawyer, Jason Buccat, told TSG that a “design problem” caused the decorative piece to come loose and strike Patterson in the eye, causing damage to her cornea. He added that the eye injury, which caused Patterson to miss a few days of work, will be “affecting her the rest of her life.” Patterson is a traffic officer with L.A.’s Department of Transportation. Prior to the lawsuit’s filing, Victoria’s Secret officials asked to examine the garment and the decorative piece, but that request was rejected by Patterson’s counsel. For those unfamiliar with “v-strings,” the undergarment is the Victoria’s Secret variant on the “g-string,” which has long been favored in the battle against visible panty lines. (4 pages)
more >

jantzie: WHAT THE
jantzie: 52?
Shmantz: and still sexy
jantzie: apparently
jantzie: you can be sexy in a thong and an eyepatch
jantzie: at any age

more cat pictures

You see this face? It's my face, pre-vacation.

Speaking of crotches related toys, check out this classic SNL commercial. Oh how I pine for the salad days!

This is exactly what I have always wanted since I knew it existed right now! I am going to get in my Delorean, go back in time, and add this on my 1986 Christmas list. After work, naturally.

I am sure my parents would never gotten it for me as all I would have done is make the action figures punch and kick each other in the crotch.

I wish Buckingham would step up his game and start really going to town on the balloon animals. If that chick can buy a house with balloons then I am pretty sure the student loans could go just as easily. Like my grandpappy used to say, “a balloon dog a day keeps the student loans away.”

Look ma, no arms! This guy is awesome, he probably plays better than I will ever play, arms or no arms.

Another video of a theremin. So beautiful.

A little history, how to, and then rock out. I am going to watch craigslist and see if pick one of these up.

PS I remembered I posted another great theremin video that looks like someone playing a song on the USS Enterprise. Who is that someone you ask? MY MOMZ.*

* not really, but I wish!

I had planned on posting a whole slew of interesting instruments last Friday until the unfortunately run-in with the squirrel sandwich video. Eeeek! I am making up for lost time by posting them today. Look out interweb, here I come.