Like monuments to the great Chicago fire, this guy should be memorialized in the station for all time. How about his name on a water fountain? At minimum give the trooper some tchotchkies, maybe a gym bag full of stress balls and a gift certificate for a spray tan. Maybe a hot plate. Scratch that, nothing that plugs in. Maybe a portable fire extinguisher with the station’s logo on it. Classy.

{source: failblog}

This is why I love England. When Buckingham and I went on holiday to London (see how I did that? yeah, that’s right, I am hip to the local vernacular), I spend so long waiting to get into Wimbledon that I was able to read an entire Daily Mail. I could have quit earlier as I was satisfied by page two; there was a highly detailed spread about a squirrel eating birdseed out of a feeder, and a photographic map showing his course from table to top of swing set to windowsill, and several quotes from the woman homeowner regarding the acrobatic skills required to complete such a feat. Forget the economy or local stabbings, more with the feel good animal tales. Long live the Queen and kitties!

{Source: BuzzFeed & dailymail.co.uk}

Favrd. *sigh* The cock that every twitterer loves to rock. I have never received a twitter notification directly from favrdbot, so I thought I might capture the moment in screenshots. You know, give the grandkids something to wonder aloud about as they scavenge my hopechest for gold to pawn, just two hours after my body is in the ground. Ah, [future] memories.

jantzie: are you wearing a christmas sweater tomorow?
shmantz: no
shmantz: that doesn’t really seem like something I would do
jantzie: that’s why you should do it
shmantz: think so?
jantzie: sure
jantzie: I want one with two wreaths over my boobies
jantzie: that would be classy
shmantz: that wold be classy, you should make one
jantzie: maybe I will stop by DI on the way home
shmantz: I’m going to welfare square on my way home
jantzie: hehe
jantzie: steak one from a hobo
jantzie: I mean steal
jantzie: steak sounds good
jantzie: hobo steak sounds REALLY good
jantzie: what do you say you and I take a long lunch, run by welfare square, steal ourselves some christmas sweatering hobo steaks?
shmantz: what does nachos american style mean?
jantzie: that’s a slap in the face to someone’s heritage
shmantz: I’m glad we’re on the same page, as an american, I’m offended
jantzie: I might buy some
jantzie: just so I can throw them on the floor
jantzie: and plant an american flag on top
shmantz: that sounds about right
jantzie: or
jantzie: what do you say you and I take a long lunch, run by welfare square, steal ourselves some christmas sweatering hobo steaks?
shmantz: I heard you the first time
jantzie: well?
shmantz: sure, I’m in
jantzie: good

Yowzers! I think we can all agree that Condoleezza Rice is definitely the Secretary of Sexy.

It’s not officially Christmas in Oklahoma until you hear this jingle. Ah, the memories.

WOW. If I went to Mr. Spriggs and they weren’t playing this on continuous loop, I would demand my money back. Oh, and a jimmy hat and two wet naps.

SEXYTIME MEETS MEATTIME! I’m so there.

The Archive from Sean Dunne on Vimeo.

I have exactly $22… anyone want to pitch in with me?

Wow. Just… wow.